Monday, December 04, 2006

*grin* Duffering

Hello there,

I hope that you all (well, the very few people who read this... probably no one... maybe i should pay people to read it :p ) decided to read "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" and its sequels. But for now i will talk to you about Duffering *grin*.

What is duffering.

One of them duffers (WHB) explanes it like this:
We are starting to hand out the title duffer to any person who posts more than 3 times a day (bit like high grades in GCSE examinations!). This is NOT duffering. True duffering cannot be expressed. It is an innate, unteachable, unlearnable skill that I envy those who have it.

Another description of Duffers is this (in the Duffer FAQ, by HB):

Q: What is a Duffer?

A: A Duffer is a term used in the narniafans forums. It originated through the Land of Duffers, where the funny members would post there and (basically) spam. Duffer is used to describe members who are especially funny and are able to light up the member's day (or at least, I hope so.)

I think this explains it pretty good: Duffers are people who are funny, but who don't have to spam to be funny. They can post things that will make you laugh 2 years later (i know that from experience *grin*).

What are examples of GREAT duffering:

This is from a topic/thread called "corrupt a wish", someone makes a wish, and the next person ruines it :p :


Smog: I wish I had a chocolate bar...

HB: Granted. It is a health chocolate bar. Without the chocolate. You try to sue the company that made the chocolate bar, because you did not become hyper and throw a chair, but then you realize that you are in an insane assylm, and there are no chairs...but there is a knife...darn, its a butter knife that can't cut through butter. What is the point in that?

I wish I had a latté

Granted. But now you become so hyper and random that you are sent to the insane asylum with me, where a try to stap you with my butter knife... but it does not work out...

I wish we could get rid of that stupid insane asylum...

GC (GrayCloak):
Granted - you, Black and Holyboy are released onto the streets where you attack people at random and steal chewing gum off the bottom of shoes. After a while of wandering you come across a shiny trash can and decide that it will be your new god, and you are its prophet charged with coversion. You spend the rest of your life in devotion to the trash can...

I wish it was night so I could go to hockey....

Granted. However, the Brotherhood of the Can only come at night. You are seen as an infidel and a unbeliever. We sacrifice you to our new god, the trash can...

I wish that the trash can was shinnier...

Granted, but when the sun shines on it blinds you, and you lose your collection of chewing gum! After scrambling around for what seems like hours you finally bump into a large object that turns out to be Holyboy, who has also been blinded and is trying to find his chewing gum. (Black Cloak fell down a drain in the confusion). The two of you hatch a plan to reclaim your beloved trash can, which has been over taken by the power of the Hog Master. Unfortunately, neither of you are any good at maths, and the catapult you created back fires and crushes you both under sojourner (who you unwittinly mistook for catapult ammo in your blindness)

I wish I could make this darned trash can dissappear

HB: Granted. Smog, BC, and I all start worshipping that butter knife mentioned a couple of posts back. We are in awe in how the butter knife can't cut through kleenex, and we start being like the knife, being one with the knife...and then a mob is formed! the mob chases you through the city, passing by the one-eyed purple people eater. You keep running...and running...and you almost reach saftey...all you have to do is tickle the yellow rino...and then a duck wakes you up, and you realize the trash can is still there, and it was all a dream...or was it? DUM DUM DUM!!!!!!!!!!

I wish I was a butterfly...because no one suspects the butterfly!

WHB: Granted, but unfortunately that is just conspiracy and in actual fact EVERYONE suspects the butterfly! You are chased down by the plice for inciting mobs to fomr in each town you pass through and forcing them to chase after innocent defencelss people like me. As punishment, they melt the butterknife down in front of your face. You're eaten by the yellow rhino for wearing a paisley jumper.

Rest of the talk can be found here: Corrupt a Wish

Personally i think this is a great example of good duffering *grins again*.

What is the Golden Age?

Aahhh, the golden age *thinks about good ol' times*... the age where the duffers ruled the forum, the age of the old members and great duffers (unfortunately many old duffers left), the days of "Glorious Food 1", "Glorious Food 2", "Corrupt a Wish", "Cheese Whiz" and much more. The days where all the Duffer objects were invented. Short: Thé days of the Duffers. I think that it was from about March 2005 untill November 2005. The current Duffers are still trying to get it back, unfortunately they have to fight against the very powerfull Skandar and William nites :p (just kidding, the nites are nice people too ;) ).

What are you talking about? Duffer objects?

In the golden age, many duffer things were invented. For example:

-Fred the Box: he is a house, and a box, and HB's best friend. He was killed many times (most of them by BC) and always managed to stay on the forum, i say he is the most known duffer thing... except The Can.

-Ben the Egg: an Egg, and a very nice one too, his whole family got killed, and he was the only one to escape. (As Dernhelm explains the sad story of Ben's life:
All right. Ben, you see, was the family name. Every boy in the family was named Ben, and every girl, Bena. One day the clan was attacked – only our Ben escaped. All the rest were taken and made into a dish that was later named "Eggs Benadict". Never mention that name to an egg, for it was the greatest tradgedy of their kind.)

-Stan the Cookie: Stan is my personal favorite. He is an elephant, and he is confused... he is a confused elephant, made up by borntofly. He is GREAT (and confused).

-Cheese: i can hear you think it: "Cheese? Dufferish?" yes, it certainly is, i think that there are at least 4 threads/topics made with the subject cheese, it's strange, but fun.

A conversation me and Dernhelm had in "More Cheese":

Dernhelm: CHEESE!

Lieke: For some reason we seem never to get rid of the "ol' food thread" egggsssss, CW and Cheese

(we likesss it, we needsss it)

Dernhelm: hehehe. Cheeeeesssssseeeee! We lovvvvesssss cheeeeesssssseee!

Lieke: precioussss cheesssseee!!!!!!! *searches franatically for some more CHEEESSSSEEEE*

Dernhelm: *finds the Stilton* Cheeesssseee!

oohh, please can i have some????

Dernhelm: *gives Lieke a slice*

YUMMIE *eats it * IT'S GONE!!!

*sees a cheese-shop* ooohhh... *runs to it*

Dernhelm: Cheese? CHEEESE!!!! *runs with lieke*


do you think that would mean us??

Huh? No; we're not crazy. But...they have Cheeese. We could...pretend to be crazy!

We might try, they will probably know immediately that we are not crazy, because we just look so normal, but Cheese is worth trying it... *puts on prented-to-be-crazy face and walks in the shop*

Dernhelm: *whispers* I think they're fooled! *picks up cheeeese...*

Yes, they are *gets some more cheese*



*grabs a couple Stiltons, then follows Lieke*

Conversation behind them:

Owner: People who like cheese are so strange.
Assistant: Crazy.
Owner: They never think they are...
Assistant: *stares* Whatever they may think, they are!
Owner: You know, our sign says FREE CHEESE FOR CRAZY CHEESE-OBSESSED-PEOPLE. Maybe we should remove the 'Crazy'.
Assistant: Do you think?



*doesn't hear the background conversation* Well, i'm glad we have some more cheese, i almost thought that they would take it away from us... and we tried so hard to be crazy. Isn't this like stealing, shouldn't we bring it back? *eats a bit cheese* yummie

Dernhelm: Maybe we should take it you think?

Lieke: We should *eats some*, i mean, even when its cheese, nothing tasts good if it's stolen *eats some more*, and if we return it, they might *eats more* give us something for being so honest.


*looks at hands*


IT'S GONE!!! WHO STOLE IT??? *looks around her*

Dernhelm: (ROFL!)

*stuffs cheese in mouth*

Lieke: it was you?? How could you? i thought we were friends, and now you ate it all by yourself *goes to sit in a dark corner and cries*

You probably should have been there, anyway: the Cheese threads are i think almost the sillyest threads on the whole forum...:D

-The Trash Can: the part from corrupt a wish above is the creation of the Trash Can. The Trash Can is the great thing for all duffers, since Smog, BC and HB started worshipping it it has become the most known (and best probably) duffer thing.

The Order of the Can:

Later, when most of the duffers left, a thread/topic was made to bring the duffers back. It was called: "The order of the Can", the highest goal in the life of a duffer is to get into that order. First there is the Can Clan, after that the Brotherhood of the Can, and then the Knights of the Order of the Can. What they do: worshipping the Trash Can, bumping old threads/topics, talking about things that don't make any sense, and much more...

When do you know that you are a duffer?

That is a question that i cannot answer. Personally i don't know whether i am one or not, and i think there are some more people who don't know... then you have some who think they are, but aren't... I guess that how you find out is: Start duffering, read the "required reading" in this thread/topic. Duffer away and get into the order of the can... But besides that: i cannot give you any advise, you have to find your own stile of duffering, and it might take a while, but remember: true duffering never lies. You will know it soon enough... and when you don't: don't worry, take your time, you will come there.

Are you one of the duffers of old times?

Nope. I am a member for a long time, but i spend my time with reading and trying to understand it all and not with duffering.

Then how can you tell us all this if you aren't a duffer?

Because i'm evil and i like to tell you things that i don't know anything about *evil laugh*

What should we do now?

Duffer away :D

Enough about duffering: from this place i would like to thank everyone for all the prayers, and hugs the last couple of days, things are working out, and it's getting better. It really helped, Thank you.

Have to go now, see you! Next time something about... i don't know yet.

So long and thanks for all the fish ;).



Anonymous Lioness_Aslan said...

Nah...Dernhelm's not a duffer ;)

9:22 PM  
Blogger Lieke said...

Good answer, if you would have said that she is she would have killed you :p

9:25 PM  
Anonymous Lioness_Aslan said...

hehe...great blog btw. I had one but I never even started it :p

8:21 PM  
Blogger Lieke said...

Thanks :) Blogs are cool, but your website is really cool too.

10:16 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey, Liek! This is Fernshirehobbit. Your definitions are hilarious. I love your blog!

12:08 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Awesome. :D Love it.

1:19 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

amazing duffer artical
I love it...too bad I was not a member when the corrupt a wish convo went on...I would have had quite some fun there...*evil laughter*
tee-hee you don't know who I am :D

7:52 PM  
Blogger Lieke said...

Evil laughter ha? I think you're RF :p

Teehee? :p

10:17 PM  
Anonymous SlpNanriaQueen said...

Great job. I agree with the 'I don't know if I'm a duffer or not' thing, and it was totally hilarious. I'm gonna memorize it. YUP YUP YUP! That's right. Memorize it and recite it every night till I fall asleep. And then when I sleep it will come back in duffer dreams and wishes that go insane...or crazy, but then again that would be normal...ya know. And then dream about how the shiny can loves me and how I know Fred the box isn't from Canada because he's U.S. Postal Service, which means he can't possibly be from Canada, but don't tell HB cuz it would break his heart, and even though I'm the #1 non-mod, and may torture the heck out of all the mods, I can't stand to see them cry. Oh and lieke, I'm eviler than you and you know it...yup yup. Waaaaaay eviler, so evil that I TOOK the butter knife and the can and Fred the box and Stan the Cookie and hid them in my garage where no one will find them Muahahahahaha! And I forget how to say squirrel in hollandesish, so if you could refresh my memory that would be great, because then I can call everyone I meet a idiot squirrel in America and they won't know what I said. And anyway, I forgot how to say idiot in hollandesish too! :o *is shocked at self* Anyway, I'm learning how to skip....*skip skip skip*

3:42 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

me? RF? *buzz* WRONG. lolz

hi SLP. I bet you know who I am...

4:54 PM  
Anonymous SlpNarniaQueen said...


1:54 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

.i'm not an it I'm a she
my names maggie but you know me best as
EFC 4ever
loooooooooooooooooover girl

ring any bells?

10:27 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

hey! am i late reading this?
oh, almost two years... i've had worse... like i was late for the declaration of independence.. wasn't even born... shame shame... wait, i'm not even american... hmmm... what to do?
*becomes american*
me: *thinks* i wasn't born... no! no! wait, i don't want to get in trouble, i was... i was... in england! yes, i was in england! drinking tea! innocently!
mob of american people: *chase*
me: crazy americans, huh... *falls off grand canyon*

4:15 PM  
Anonymous Narniafan4life said...

Great examples of "duffering!" I just joined the Narnia fans website so I plan on looking at more duffering soon. =)

5:16 AM  
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10:23 AM  

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